From Human Doing to Human Being

Last week, my husband, Sam, and I returned from visiting my family in California on a 3-week trip. Almost immediately, I found myself feeling behind—like I had lost time, missed opportunities, and needed to catch up on all the “valuable” work I hadn’t done. The gratitude I’d felt for the really special time with my family faded quickly, replaced by pressure to be productive again.

Being productive and an achievement-oriented person is not something to be ashamed of, but there’s often a tendency in us to tie our worth to what we do. And if we live off of meeting other people’s expectations or staying busy to “keep up,” we miss out on the freeing invitation to live as our authentic selves.

- Instead of identifying as a “human doing,” we can see ourselves as a “human being.” -

When we live from the identity of being, we move more intentionally. We begin to make clearer decisions as we recognize what aligns with our values and shed the guilt of not performing perfectly for others. We act out of willingness and not as much out of obligation.

Last week in Space to Breathe coaching, we defined boundaries as intentional choices or structures that we put in place to protect our ability to focus on what’s most important in our season of life. Like a trellis supporting a vine, they help us to navigate our day more closely in line with our values so that we can contribute from a more authentic place.

Here’s a quick little table for reference.

A Quick Comparison